Today I weighed in at 12 lbs less than I started 2012. I feel good about that, and I feel good knowing that if I keep at it, I will possibly be lighter than when we got married when I get pregnant again - and that is my goal. Ideally, I'd like to be under 140 lbs.
I weighed 197 at my last midwife appointment before Gavin was born. And I was down to 175 at my first check-up postpartum. Then I spent the summer working out, after the initial 8 weeks of prescribed downtime, and trying to eat right--but not succeeding very often. Cupcakes. Oh, cupcakes. And peanut butter. I digress...
Then I went back to work in October and I was still 174 lbs. And then the holidays. Down to 169 at one point then back up to 174. Time to get serious.
December 30th I signed up the Rock N Roll Portland Half Marathon, and I roped my husband Garrett into doing it with me. We looked up the website, paid the fees, and it was official. I started running again as often as I could get to it--which was only about once or twice a week. I still feel slow and heavy, but it definitely feels good to get out there again.
January 1st I started logging my foods using CalorieCount.com. It's a free site and I have used it before to log food and exercise, successfully losing about 20 lbs. It's a simple program that's based on calories in and calories out. -3500 calories in a week would be a pound of weight lost. Easy. I started weighing my foods again, and it really put a stop to my snacking and sweets addiction.
Then I had to figure out how/where/when I was going to get my sweat on if Garrett was working out of town, or working nights, and I couldn't leave the house after Gavin went to sleep. I can't go to the gym in the morning or after Gavin goes to sleep because those are usually the times I'm home alone with him. I hate to go to the gym after work because I feel bad that Gavin is at daycare (or at my in-laws--twice a week) while I'm exercising. I've already been away from him all day and there's only a limited time he's going to be awake before we have to get ready for bed. So I only do that once a week, if at all. I've found that I have to run on the weekends, both Saturday and Sunday, and if I can get some sort of workout done at home twice a week I'll be happy. So I've come up with the TV Circuit Training -- that's what I call it: lunges, wall sits, pushups, squats, shoulder presses, etc. while I watch tv. I do an exercise until the scene changes and then I do jumping jacks during commercials. So far I've only been able to do it for about 20 minutes at a time, but I'm working up to 30 minutes, and my goal is to get to one hour. I know I can do it.
So, while my journey is difficult, and frustrating at times, it has been empowering too. I have found myself being creative and efficient in ways I never thought I could (or want to) so that I can be healthier and be a healthy role model for my son. My mission is to be at a healthy weight. To make as many meals at home as I can. To plan for meals and grocery shop efficiently and eat as many whole, unprocessed foods as possible. I also want to sweat for at least 20 minutes 3-4 days per week minimum.
I know there are other moms out there who go through this, so I know I'm not alone. And that, in itself, makes me feel better.
(And for the record, this post was titled "The Battle with my Baby Weight" at first. But I can't think of my body that way - I don't want to fight my body, I want to show that I love it.)
